Got To Talking..

With my friend and roommate about relationships and getting intimate with someone. I've only been with one other person besides my husband and that was because I was "dating" this person. Basically for 14 years, I only knew my husband at the time and thought I was ready to move on and be with someone else. HUGE mistake..the sex was awful and lets face it, I wasn't ready. Bad sex ruins everything....it just does. If your heart isn't in it, it is going to be awkward. The connection my husband and I use to share was amazing and to have that was the best feeling and it scares me to have that again. Think it would scare anyone who was ever in love once before. Like I said before, I'm not afraid of love, just afraid of losing myself and being the person I use to be. Sad, unhappy, 100lbs heavier, and depressed. I'n not the same person I was 2 years ago, I'm not even the same person I was in Colorado, honestly. Anyways, thanks for reading my ramblings and I think I'm finally no longer stuck in my head.......lol TTFN, Justine